Closer Than You Think

Last week, I was asked to substitute for a pickleball ladder. All three matches were competitive - the kind that make you lean in, focus harder, and forget about everything else for a while. Some people refer to it as being in the zone.  I loved it.

But here’s the thing — I was sure the other players were all higher ranked. They seemed to hit every shot exactly where it needed to go. I, on the other hand, felt like the weak link. The one that will go ‘down the ladder’ next week because I will have the lowest cumulative score.

That’s the voice that still pops up in my head sometimes - the one that says you’re not good enough.I’ve been working hard to quiet her. To turn off that self-criticism loop that so many of us hear on repeat.

It’s funny, isn’t it? I once read that men will apply for a job if they meet just 60% of the listed qualifications, but women usually won’t apply unless they meet every single one. We hesitate. We doubt. We hold ourselves back — even when we’re absolutely capable.

So when I got home, I checked the DUPR app — the official rating system for players in the ladder. And sure enough, every one of them was rated higher than me.

But here’s the part that surprised me — not by much.Just .05 and .2 points.

I paused and thought: I’m right there with them.

I realized how often I convince myself I’m miles behind, when in truth, I’m close, really close and maybe if I just flipped the negative self talk switch off or ‘reframed’ to a positive statement like…we all start somewhere, or take time to notice that they too make mistakes perhaps, my play will elevate. Maybe I’m the one holding me back by my negative self talk.

It made me wonder how many times in life I’ve underestimated myself that way. How many opportunities I’ve dismissed because I told myself I wasn’t ready, good enough, or qualified.

Maybe you’ve done that too.

So here’s to small surprises that remind us we’re closer than we think. Here’s to progress measured not by perfection, but by courage — the courage to show up, play hard, and see what happens.

Because sometimes the biggest victory isn’t the match we win — it’s silencing that old, tired voice that says we don’t belong on the court in the first place.